Thursday 9 May 2013

Infinity Plus One

(Dangerfield BSc, Registered Scientician, #4. 2008)


The other day I told my friend that she was stupid times infinity, only to have her reply that I was stupid times infinity plus one. Is her assertion mathematically sound? (Timothy Sherman, Opoho)

Well Timothy, the existence of numbers larger than infinity is a question that has intrigued mathematicians for centuries. Of course, to prove that there are numbers larger than infinity, they first had to prove the existence of infinity itself. While the concept of infinity had been theorised for centuries, there was only one way to prove for sure that it existed: start at the number ‘one’ and count your way up. The first recorded attempt to do so was made by Scottish mathematician John McIvor in 1782. However, this valiant bid for infinity was cut short after the number 39, when the elderly Scotsman decided that he would rather have a warm glass of milk and an early night.

The next noteworthy attempt to count to infinity occurred several centuries later. It was made by a young American by the name of Chuck Johnson during a live television special in 1968. He began counting in the early evening and eventually reached infinity after three and a half hours, at which point he was greeted with thunderous applause from the audience. However, his glory was short-lived: upon reviewing the videotape, it was discovered that Chuck had missed ‘1,672’, thus falling short of infinity by a single number.

It was not until 1982 that infinity was finally conquered, this time by a team of highly-trained Swiss mathematicians. The team counted incredibly slowly over the course of nine years to ensure that no numbers were missed, and their extreme care paid off: infinity was eventually reached at 9:52pm on June 12th. However, their success was tainted by the fact that five members of their team died during the marathon attempt.

Once the existence of infinity was proved, a new question arose: were there numbers even larger than infinity? However, the Swiss tragedy had made mathematicians reluctant to try counting that high again. Progress ground to a halt, and the question of larger numbers lay dormant for years. Then, in 1992, there was a sudden breakthrough: a Harvard mathematician by the name of Gerard Smith realised that since infinity existed, and the number one existed, one could simply add the two numbers together to produce ‘infinity plus one’. This startling discovery reignited interest in the field, and suddenly new numbers were being discovered on an almost daily basis. Within a month, the existence of the numbers ‘infinity plus two’ through ‘infinity plus sixty-two’ had been comprehensively proven. Today, with the aid of advanced computers, mathematicians are even coming close to proving the existence of ‘infinity times infinity plus one’. So yes, Timothy, I’m afraid that your friend’s assertion of your high level of stupidity was mathematically legitimate.

At the time of writing, the existence of ‘one bazillion’ has not yet been proven.

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